okay, so this past week or so i've been really down... depressed, if you will... and after a week of eating rabbit food (and the rare pancake) and things not working out for me, i've had enough... i just want to scream... and i have...
first off, playing that stupid game was the worst idea i've ever had... that's the first and last time i'll listen to a cosmo suggestion... that's what set this whole mood i've been in in motion... instead of thinking about the positive things, i just keep dwelling on the negative... i thought i was confident enough in myself to accept the negative things, and learn from them... but i guess i wasn't... and now, i feel like i can't be good enough...
and the past couple of days, i had something to bring a little light to my life... i was getting a surprise... supposed to get it today... so i'd been so looking forward to today... i built it up so much because it made me happy... and when it didn't come today, i was so let down... and because i'll be out of town till thurs of next week, i won't get it till then... and i don't know who/what to be upset with... upset with myself for relying on this to make me happy? upset with my hero for telling me that it would be here on saturday (but to his credit, he'd just assumed that UPS delivered on sat)? or upset with UPS for not fully informing chris that saturday isn't a delivery day, even though, i've had packages delivered by UPS to me here before on saturdays? i'm just so upset, and let down...
after nearly 2 weeks of crying, you'd think i'd have no tears left... blah... will i ever get back to that happy carefree princess???
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